Dyuman’s Correspondence with the Mother: Fourth Installment

Dyuman 4

Dear Friends,

Chunibhai Patel (19.6.1903—19.8.1992) was a Gujarati sadhak who was renamed ‘Dyuman’ (“the luminous one”) by Sri Aurobindo on 24 November 1928. He visited Pondicherry for the first time on 11 July 1924 and surrendered himself to Sri Aurobindo. He became an inmate of Sri Aurobindo Ashram in May 1927. He was in charge of the Dining Room and looked after the Granary. A dedicated worker to the core, the Mother made him one of the Founder-Trustees of Sri Aurobindo Ashram Trust on 1 May 1955. He became the Managing Trustee of Sri Aurobindo Ashram Trust in 1991.

We are happy to announce that Overman Foundation has received permission from Sri Aurobindo Ashram Trust to publish Dyuman’s Correspondence with the Mother in its online forum. We are extremely grateful to Shri Manoj Das Gupta, Managing Trustee of Sri Aurobindo Ashram Trust, for giving us the said permission. We are also thankful to Shri S. Ravi, co-editor of Mother India journal and teacher at Sri Aurobindo International Centre of Education for providing these letters to us.

The first three installments of Dyuman’s Correspondence with the Mother—consisting of letters written between 12 June 1929 and 11 January 1935 were published in the online forum of Overman Foundation on 23 June, 27 June and 21 July 2015 respectively. The fourth installment of the said correspondence—containing letters written between 19 January 1935 and 7 June 1935 has been published in the online forum of Overman Foundation. Please note that these letters are not included in the Collected Works of the Mother.

With warm regards,
Anurag Banerjee
Founder.
Overman Foundation

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sketch of Dyuman made by the Mother

A pencil-sketch of Dyuman made by the Mother

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Dear Mother,

On this coming Wednesday, we are thinking of preparing Halwa. Now that it is a routine dish, shall I try it once without cashew-nuts and raisins?

Will it not be a little tasteless?

19 January 1935

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Dear Mother,

My love for You is too little, too shallow. My self-offering and devotion are too flat and full of turmoil. My consciousness is too clouded, not clear and transparent.

My dear Mother, I know this, yet I know also: there is a certitude of Victory and Realisation.

It is all right to see the imperfections and deficiencies but only on condition that it brings a greater courage for a new progress, an increase of energy in the determination, and a stronger certitude of victory and future perfection.

Always with you.

21 January 1935

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My dear Mother,

I have deceived myself and You all along; I am filled with imperfections and lower impulses. I boasted of my purity, but now I see that it was all boasting, full of pride and ego.

Dear Mother, make me vividly conscious of all my defects and imperfections. I lose neither courage nor heart or strength. My strength is You, and in You I rest.

Everything will be all right in time. There is only to keep up a patient aspiration and an unfailing confidence in the Divine Grace and its assured victory.

Always with you.

23 January 1935

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My dear Mother,

B saw the cupboard to be repaired and told me: “This is quite the old pattern; even if I repair it, it will not be safe. Ask the Mother for a new one.”

I told him: “I have no heart to reject the old one.”

He said: “It is your economic nature that goes on using the old one. Everybody is giving away the old furniture and is asking for new.”

My dear Mother, let us use what we have. This attitude of B is a very big drain on the Ashram energy.

Yes — it is quite a wrong attitude.

24 January 1935

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My dear Mother,

C told me: “Sometimes when the flow of Light comes down from above, I say: ‘Not now, let me finish this work.’”

I said: “Never do that. Receive it, welcome it, allow it to come. It is the physical consciousness that wants to have its own old nature.”

Surely what you said was right. Moreover with a little practice the light can be fully received and still the work go on. But this condition comes later.

With all love and blessings always.

28 January 1935

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My dear Mother,

An Aroumé servant asked for half a day leave for tomorrow morning. I told D I need a replacement, but it seems he does not have sufficient hands and cannot spare a man. If a servant comes to do part of the work, it is all right. Otherwise, we can manage with what we have quite easily.

It is better to insist a little with D — the difficulties come from inadequate organisation and by insisting it obliges them to make an effort and the difficulties get solved.

6 February 1935

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My dear Mother,

Now You know F’s absurdity, for she has written to You what she wanted to do today. I am happy that she is now free from that.

Sri Aurobindo has just read her letter to me — you did well to console her. These ideas of incapacity are absurd, they are the negation of the truth of progress. What cannot be done today, will be done another day — if the aspiration is there.

6 February 1935

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My dear Mother,

F has gone into a state of depression and despondency. To imagine, to invent, to justify and assent to falsehoods as the Reality and Truth — this is a chronic disease with many of us. May this nature of purely vital ignorance and physical stupidity disappear from the Ashram.

Surely it will be a very good thing when all these ignorant depressions are chased away.

7 February 1935

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My dear Mother,

What’s the matter in the Dining Room? Why do we take pleasure in coming into conflict with each other? Is there even one day that has passed peacefully until now? Why do we seek for power instead of consecrating ourselves at the feet of the Divine?

Save us, save us, O dear Mother.

There is only to be patient — all that will pass one day. Perhaps in the state of their present consciousness they would find life too dull without quarrels.

Since yesterday I have been thinking of taking up the serving and distribution of food.

I do not think it is possible. I do not like that you should be bound by a regular work like that one. The rest would suffer.

My dear Mother, grant me an absolute loving consecration to Thee. Make me Thy humble and docile servant. And wherever I am asked to serve, give me gentleness and peace. Teach me to be Thy docile servant.

Surely you will do more and more perfectly your service to the Divine.

9 February 1935

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Dear Mother,

I am often called a “miser” because of my resistance to outer suggestions. I am a miser! If I become generous and lavish, as the inmates want me to be — which is absolutely impossible —we must put aside not 16 thousand rupees for food but 30 or 40 thousand rupees. How shall we do so?

You are quite right and I do not find you a miser.

If I listened to what the people say, we should have been ruined long ago.

My dear loving Mother, make me more and more true and faithful to Thee. O my dear Love, may the Divine Grace alone manifest.

You have chosen the right path. Do not mind what the others say.

In all love and trust.

10 February 1935

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My dear Mother,

Today I experienced that wherever I turned my eyes, I found You claiming all; I left all, ran to You, Mother, called You, threw myself at Your Feet, and I had all, and You.

This is a very good experience.

My dear Mother, always Thy child, make me Thy child, a true child.

Yes, my true child whom I keep always in my arms.

12 February 1935

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My dear Mother,

A display of tremendous energy: the lady workers of Aroumé worked from 5 in the morning to 3 in the afternoon. This is not the first time; once they worked from 6 a.m. to 6 p.m. at a stretch.

O my dear Mother, let the energy be consecrated to the Divine consciously; let it be a pure self-giving to the Divine.

Yes, with consecration the work can be done much more easily and happily. But nobody must be asked a greater effort than what he can do.

27 February 1935

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O my dear Mother,

I am becoming more quiet and peaceful. It is peace and equanimity that have made my work easier and simpler and brought goodwill where there was bad will.

Yes, let the peace and the quietness settle more and more in you and everything will become easy in your work.

Always with you.

9 March 1935

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My dear Mother,

The Aroumé servants are obedient and willing workers, never absent without informing me previously. Even when they are ill, they come and take leave. I think it is the result of my kind and gentle behaviour with them.

Yes, I am sure that servants behave according to the way they are treated.

10 March 1935

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My dear Mother,

The negligence of G and H today reminded me of past cases where I and my fellow workers were treated like butlers and couriers. Happily, it passed away very quickly. We may not be close friends, but surely we have to co-operate fully in the work.

Yes, it is good to turn a difficulty into an occasion for a new progress.

With love and blessings always.

12 March 1935

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My dear Mother,

What should my attitude be towards F in her disturbances?

My dear Mother, let there be no attachment in me for others; let there be purely a goodwill and a heart filled with loving consecration to the Divine. If help of consolation comes from me, or rather through me, let it be purely a divine work.

Yes, it is like that that the help becomes true and effective.

To do at each moment the best we can and leave the result to the Divine’s decision, is the surest way to peace, happiness, strength, progress and final perfection.

With love and blessings always.

15 March 1935

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My dear Mother,

A complete reliance upon the Divine Grace alone gives peace, happiness and joy. That is because the Divine Himself takes up the devotee and carries him or her in His arms.

Yes, the Grace is infinite for one who sincerely trusts the Grace.

Always with you, my dear child.

15 March 1935

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Dear Mother,

What about J? What work will he do? He has not spoken to me about anything.

He has not been accepted as a permanent member and that is why no work has been given to him. He is married and has children and he wanted to bring the whole lot here. He has always lived on K’s charity. We do not need this kind of people here.

21 March 1935

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My dear Mother,

A full trust and confidence in the Divine Love saves a sadhak from all dangers and difficulties and gives him happiness, peace and joy.

My dear Mother, grant me a force that brings an integral and complete self-giving to the Divine.

Yes, it is a sincere self-giving that saves one from all difficulties and dangers.

With love and blessings always.

28 March 1935

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My dear Mother,

L was getting suggestions that she would become mad. It seems that many people said to her: “Why do you laugh so much?”— even when she was not laughing. I told her: “These are suggestions thrown upon you; you are not like that. On the contrary, it is such a nice thing, this laughter, a sort of great release and liberation.”

Yes, she must not fear — it is all stupid suggestions and you spoke quite well.

31 March 1935

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My dear Mother,

I want You to interfere in all my movements, whatever they are; and Your interference will be promptly responded to with love and submission, with an earnest will to change as You would like. I want You, I seek for You day and night, night and day — for Your Light, for Your Consciousness, for Your Force.

O Mother, come into my entire being, my smallest cell, the tiniest drop of my blood. Come, my dear Mother, and make the whole being Your seat.

My dear child, with all my love I take you in my arms as my own child and assure you that you will become more and more mine.

3 April 1935

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My dear Mother,

We have to find somebody for the washing and wiping of vessels. I do not know who it could be.

It seems to me that the only solution is that M should work himself, instead of throwing all the work upon others.

6 April 1935

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My dear Mother,

A big disturbance is hovering over the kitchen. Twice it appeared a few days back, but it was controlled. N has accused me directly of being unfair. I tried to explain to her each time, but the roots have not disappeared.

The best is to ignore all these petty things. To want only what the Divine wants in us and for us, is the only important thing.

6 April 1935

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Dear Mother,

I thought I had a very pure relation with the inmates, but today I see that it was all humbug. There is a still greater purity to manifest and to live.

When I go deep down and analyse myself, I find the lower vital impulses, the animal impulses of ordinary human life and its instincts. These things have no strength to make me act physically but I understand now that they creep in and govern the lower vital nature in a very subtle polished form.

Yes, these things were to be seen. It is good that you have seen them; but now there is only to be quiet, happy and peaceful in a steady will that all the nature should be enlightened.

6 April 1935

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My dear Mother,

Blessed be the day when there will be peace, gentleness, kindness and the manifestation of Love.

My dear Mother, may the Divine manifest.

I would say: may the world become aware that the Divine is manifesting!

8 April 1935

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My dear Mother,

The kitchen has not yet finished its troubles, and now the serving section has begun.

We are not trained to resist all evil, nor disciplined enough to persist after the Truth, nor cultured enough to live a quiet and happy life.

Yes, the suggestion of disturbance and dissatisfaction has become very strong and many respond to it; but we have only to keep quiet, very quiet, more and more quiet as an answer to the growing restlessness and stand calmly until the storms are over.

It is only a perfect Peace that can overcome all these excited fits…

With all love and blessings always.

9 April 1935

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My dear Mother,

Water supply: Aroumé consumes a good deal of water for drinking, cooking and washing. If it happens again like today that there is no water from the taps for many hours, what shall we do? We shall have to use the well. The water will be fetched from it, boiled, passed through a cloth and used for cooking, drinking and washing vessels.

It is ABSOLUTELY IMPOSSIBLE to use the well water (even boiled) for drinking — the well water of the town is contaminated by infiltrations — this means typhoid and cholera — and for cooking also it is impossible because the well water has a filthy taste and smell.

12 April 1935

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My dear Mother,

P bought some things last month and did not pay for them. Today R gave me the money to pay on her behalf. After that I began to think: so many people are buying things in their own capacity. Do they all pay cash or they remain as debtors? Can they not be stopped!

I have tried several times but never succeeded and the result was only that they began hiding things from me, which made their case much worse.

13 April 1935

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My dear Mother,

Feeding animals in Aroumé: crows, squirrels, etc. come in a very big number. They not only eat up what is thrown to them by S, but also what is put for drying in the sun. Even they eat up raisins and cashew-nuts and spoil the sugar and such things, it is too much. I feel we should stop this feeding and lessen the number of animals in Aroumé.

Now that they have taken the habit of coming it may be difficult to stop them, but you may try.

21 April 1935

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My dear Mother,

More peace brings more Light, and that sets everything right. O Lord, more peace.

Yes, it is in peace that the knowledge and the power can manifest.

Always with you.

24 April 1935

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My dear Mother,

How is it that I read nothing, learn nothing! Some people learn languages, some learn painting, some learn singing; many read books on yoga and some are typing out Sri Aurobindo’s articles in “Arya”.

All that is for people who have a restless mind and need some mental occupation.

How is it I do nothing? This becomes a riddle to me at times, and I have no solution except this: it does not matter, let me have my Mother; it is quite sufficient if I have her.

This is surely the best.

Always with you, my dear child.

28 April 1935

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My dear Mother,

In advancing towards the realisation there might come difficulties. I pass over them as the Mother’s child; I begin the sadhana as a child of the Mother, I advance like that and even in fulfilment I remain Thy child, my dear Mother, a child of eternity.

Yes, you will always be my dear child and thus you will reach the realisation.

29 April 1935

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My dear Mother,

Tomorrow I am finishing the medicine for boils. May this be the last medicine for me. O body consciousness, open yourself to the dear Mother and get yourself filled with her Love.

Yes, there comes a time when medicines are no more needed, but that means that the body consciousness is quite opened to the force from above and that a strong unwavering will is established in the material.

With all love and blessings to you, my dear child.

30 April 1935

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My dear Mother,

I have seen this: the Ashram has no hostile forces; it is filled with the Mother. It is only when we open to these hostile forces, calling them in, that they come and disturb us. If we remained calm, quiet and open to the Divine alone, the life of the Ashram would undergo a very rapid transformation and there would be peace, joy and happiness.

This is quite true. The peace and the happiness are always there.

With you always.

30 April 1935

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My dear Mother,

Peace and an unshakeable equanimity are the firm basis for happiness, joy and progress towards the Goal. May it increase in me, in all of us in the Ashram.

Our love and blessings are always with you, establishing equanimity as an indispensable basis for the Realisation.

2 May 1935

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O my dear Mother,

My heart is filled with gratitude that You brought me here. You fished me out of the lower nature and kept me in the bosom of Your eternal love.

O my dear Mother, teach me to love Thee, to surrender to Thee; teach me to be Thine, more truly Thine.

Yes, I am keeping you in my arms and surrounding you with my love which united to your aspiration will take you to the goal.

6 May 1935

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My dear Mother,

In Aroumé there are a good number of people having moods; none can say when these moods will come — they come without any reason.

Moods are all over the Ashram — they come from the obscurity and bad will of the physical mind. When the physical mind will consent to open to the light all these moods will disappear.

With love and blessings always.

11 May 1935

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My dear Mother,

Too frequently I meet people in their difficulties and bad conditions. In this state I go deep down within myself, and my being rises in a great and fervent prayer to You:

O my dear Mother, make me more and more selfless, completely selfless, filled only with Your Purity, Peace, Consciousness, Love and Light.

I am always with you and you will never call me in vain — our peace, love, help and protection will always answer to your call.

13 May 1935

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My dear Mother,

There is misuse of filtered water in Aroumé; people are taking too much water in their tumblers and then throwing it away. No external rule can alter the situation; there has to be a change of consciousness and a complete consecration to the Divine.

Surely you are quite right—but we have to provide until the change of consciousness takes place!

Herewith a notice that can be put in Aroumé and also here near the filter.

Always with you.

14 May 1935

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Dear Mother,

When anything happens to the body, it loses courage at once and becomes weak, helpless and full of fear. In one word, there is no peace and equanimity in the body consciousness. Not only the body but the entire consciousness gets clouded and veiled; there is no remembrance of the Divine in the physical consciousness and it is this that catches the illness and prolongs it.

Yes, this is quite rightly observed—but to have become conscious of it is a big step towards a successful transformation of the body consciousness and the victory over illness.

My love and blessings are always with you.

15 May 1935

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My dear Mother,

Unless the body consciousness opens and receives the Divine Light, Peace and Consciousness, nothing of permanence is achieved. The body is the base, and upon that base the Divine has to work and construct a building. However much the vital and the mental are open and receptive, nothing can be said to be permanent if the body is not stable.

I am glad that you had the experience of the necessity for the body to open and to receive the divine Light and Will, as the mind and the heart does. This will do much for the increase of the resistance to illness and the capacity of keeping good health.

I am always with you.

15 May 1935

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My dear Mother,

I am always given to Thee and to Thy Work. Make me more quiet, make me rest in full peace amidst these hundredfold activities. I have to learn this more and more, and You have to teach me. Teach me, my dear Mother, to be more and more Thine.

Yes, I am always with you, teaching you the true action and the true consecration.

19 May 1935

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My dear Mother,

The most important thing for me to do is to remain quietly happy, consecrated and concentrated on You, and to do what has to be done very sincerely and devotionally, not worrying about the future, but quietly aspiring very humbly before You.

Yes, this is the right attitude and the most sure way.

Always with you in an affectionate trust.

27 May 1935

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My dear Mother,

What did I see this evening when You were looking at me from Your window? I saw that my chest was as transparent as glass and that You were seeing Your own image there.

My dear Mother is always in my heart for eternity. My Mother, my Mother, my Mother.

This is a very beautiful and true experience. I am happy you had it. Yes, I am always in your heart — for ever with you.

28 May 1935

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My dear Mother,

I fail to understand why there is so much antipathy against me in the Aroumé workers?

I do not think it is so bad as all that.

Three days back, as soon as I entered the Aroumé gate from the market, a force ran through my neck, saying: “It would have been better if you had died.”

Do not listen to all this rubbish. It does not come from the Aroumé workers, but from some hostile force that wants to upset you.

Yesterday when I was taking my lunch, a force wanted to send me away from Aroumé: “Go away, go away, you are not wanted here.”

Same explanation as above.

And now B tells me: “I shall not be able to cooperate with you in this way, nor shall I be able to work with you.” I do not even know what “way” he means.

My dear Mother, all is left to you. I rest happily and go to bed.

Yes, be quiet and do not worry about all that.

It is the same forces which want to make you believe that your co-workers hate you and make the others believe that you hate them. The mistake is to believe these forces—one ought always to answer them: No, it is not true, it cannot be.

Always with you, my dear child.

30 May 1935

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My dear Mother,

I thought that as I have grown bulky, I might not be able to work physically. But I find that I can work with a sustained energy, quietly and with a balanced mind. And I think You are quite happy to see me working.

Yes, I am very glad to see you working physically and am sure it will do you much good. I am glad also that your body is getting a little less thin. It was truly necessary to fill the holes!

All love and blessings to you, my dear child.

30 May 1935

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My dear Mother,

Today I heard C and D quarrelling. Afterwards, F told someone: “Prison life is easier than to work with C.”

Would it not be better if you spoke to D? If he is not satisfied, it is better for him to tell it frankly rather than to complain hidingly.

Always with you, my dear child.

1 June 1935

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My dear Mother,

I have spoken to D very clearly: “Give dumb service; utter not a word even if there are whips on your back.”

If you mean that there must be no quarrels it is quite all right. But he must feel free to tell me what he has in his heart.

“Work can never be done if there is no discipline! The Mother knows very well the person in charge of the work, and those who work with him have to follow his instructions.” And he has agreed to that kind of work.

Let us see, my dear Mother. I wish that dumb service should be given to You by all of us.

I wanted to tell him also that if he has any complaint to make or if he is not satisfied with his work, it is to me that he must freely say so.

My love, blessings and trust are always with you, my dear child.

2 June 1935

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My dear Mother,

I, who was so social and friendly to all, am becoming more reserved day by day and relate to others only for the work or for business. Often the suggestion has passed in me that even with those I am somewhat free with, I should relate just for the work.

This is not necessary nor even advisable. You must feel free to speak to them and help them when they need it. Go on with them as you do — it is all right.

Grant me the strength, my dear Mother, to remain quite faithful to the Divine Will.

Yes, the strength is always with you to be always faithful to the Divine Will.

2 June 1935

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My dear Mother,

There is not a single worker in Aroumé who has not shown his or her bright side — love, devotion and service to the Divine. That is the light which shines in each of us; that I adore and through it I always feel in harmony with the inmates. That is what I put in front in my dealings with them.

Good.

Difficulties each of us has, some more, some less, but it is foolish to have contempt for someone having troubles. On the contrary, a sympathetic heart must go out to them in all goodwill and kindness, to help them out of their difficulties.

What you say is quite right and with this attitude there is no doubt that, sooner or later, the difficulties will vanish.

All love and blessings to you my dear child.

4 June 1935

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My dear Mother,

The work in our courtyard garden: as you saw, I can do good work as a coolie also, and though completely soiled with earth all over, I can remain Your child.

I was very pleased to see you enjoying your work. I hope you will rest very well this night and your body will get stronger and stronger.

I feel that it would be good for us inmates to do some sort of manual work — but the wish must come from within our hearts.

Yes, it is when it comes spontaneously from the good will of the heart that it is helpful in all ways.

I am quietly happy, with a greater confidence that the Divine Will is always victorious. The increased confidence gives me more strength, quietness, peace, patience and a force that serves the Divine Will.

Yes, with the growing confidence comes the growing force and the growing capacity to receive it.

All love and blessings to you, my dear child.

6 June 1935

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My dear, dear Mother,

I am happy with an increasing daily experience: My Mother is in my heart. She who supports me, guides me, loves me, She is the soul of this body and much more than that.

My dear Mother, I love You with all my heart.

Yes, you are truly in my arms, arms of love that always keep you close, very close to me.

6 June 1935

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My dear Mother,

At work two parties have formed — the quarrels go on daily and the smallest thing becomes a mountain. Both parties are quite dissatisfied with me because I do not take sides, I hear nobody and I put forth my case of peace and quietness.

What you are doing is quite all right. The most important thing is to keep an unshakeable quietude and peace. One day or another it will act upon them.

Desires, desires, have they no end? Yes, they have, the moment we turn towards the Divine and quietly aspire for Him, giving ourselves completely and sincerely to Him.

Yes, you are right. Keep a constant faith in the Divine’s final Victory.

7 June 1935

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My dear Mother,

Where You are, I am. And I have no place to go except into Your loving and affectionate consciousness.

Yes, my dear child, your home is here and I am always with you.

7 June 1935

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